I'm 29, now what?

You would think I would be acting more mature. Think again.
I don't want to. I don't feel like it. I just wont. I like basking in my immaturity. It keeps me happy... and/or naive, however you want to look at it. And right now I want to really really act like a child.

I so want to play hooky from work, but just so that I can say I did. No worries, I wont. I may be immature but I can achieve that (very well) and still be responsible. My lab-made-baby is expensive after all.

I think I may need a night light. Jeff has been gone since yesterday for work related crap and I'm all alone. Its my first time evah alone in ANY house. I'm not going to lie, every little noise I heard last night had me skeered. Tonight should be fun, again.

I also want to stamp my feet real hard. Over and over again and refuse profusely to be in the situation that requires IVF. It's hard to accept that I, Shanny, need to have IVF if I want to experience motherhood. What has the world come to? It doesn't make sense. I had the IVF info session on Tuesday and things have been set in motion. I'm even more skeered now. The good thing about IVF? apart from the whole "being able to have a baby" side of it. I get to own a nurse. She belongs to me now and will have to do as I say (or the other way around, I guess), and will have to answer all of my questions. Which is good because I've been wondering a lot of things, like: why is the Sun hot? Things like that, and she has to answer because she is assigned to me and can't escape.

And the biggest thing I want is this:
I want to be at the receiving end of the green envy look that infertiles like myself tend to give ALL pregnant women we see. I want to see them look at my baby bump and give me a scornful look. That's what I want.

So as you can see, I've put all of my 28 years of experience in immaturity into good use at 29.