Friday, April 9, 2010

Why Did I Think That Things could Go Smoothly for us?

You would think after our experiences I would know better....

Yesterday was our NT scan, where they measure the fluid in the back of the babie's necks to screen for abnormalities. The scan apparently showed the bottom Twin to be doing fine but the top Twin seemed to have too big a gap in the measurement. Here is the thing though, Jeff and I saw the exact same thing and we are sticking to it: with the first baby she measured a space in between the neck and we could clearly see that. BUT the second baby we both saw her measuring the space between the neck and the sack....which would obviously show a bigger gap, right?

Did we say something to her? No. She is the expert. We both said what we saw to each other right away but we didn't speak up to her. Jeff only told our Doctor what we saw after, but of course she said that the other biotch (I don't like her for obvious reasons) was the expert. We were in too much of a shock to argue with the experts. In any case, not only do they want us to do a CVS (they remove a tiny sample from the placenta) to test any genetic disorder and its more accurate than this ultrasound screening but we are supposed to start thinking of possibly terminating my Twin.

How about NO? I know that if its one of the really bad defects (Trisomy 13 or Trisomy 18) it could affect the other twin. And don't ask me what those are because as informed as I am I REFUSE to read anything negative, I don't know what they are because I don't want to know what they are and because I DONT NEED to know what they are. MY TWINS HAVE TO BE FINE.

I cannot willingly go to terminate either of them, I just can't. Not after all we've gone through to even get to this point.

When my CVS testing comes back normal I'm going back to smack that lady. Now, I'm only nervous and crying and angry and since Jeff read that Twins should not be tested for CVS I don't know what to do. I'll just go and cry some more.

27 comments:

  1. Oh wow. I am shocked for you, and I'll be praying the CVS comes back perfect!!! Hang in there- will be praying for you!

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  2. Stay strong. I pray that what they saw was nothing and that both your babies are safe and healthy.

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  3. Shanny!!!! Oh my gosh, I am praying hardcore for you. Your babies are going to be just fine. So sorry you're having to endure this anxiety and worry. Please rest up and place your hands on your belly and just speak life over those precious babes. God has them in the palm of his hand and I firmly believe that they will be happy, healthy beautiful and perfect children. Seriously praying for you, your husband and the twinies!

    *HUGS*

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  4. Shanny, I'll be praying so hard for you. I think your and Jeff's intution is right and I can't wait until you get back normal results so you can rest peacefully.

    I applaud you for not thinking of termininating one of your twin's life. You are already an AMAZING mother.

    You have tons of support and prayers coming your way.

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  5. Oh Im so sorry your going through this!! I agree with the other comment put your hand on that belly of yours and pray. Just pray thats all you can do right now. We will all be praying with you Shanny!

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  6. I'm so sorry Shanny! The last thing you need is a stupid ultrasound tech! When is the next test being done? I can't wait until you get back the results that everything is GREAT! I am staying positive with you!
    LTB

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  7. I'm so sorry Shanny, I hope and pray that she just made a mistake and that everything will be fine. I can't wait for you to get the great news back and back to enjoying your pregnancy!

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  8. SHANNY,I HAVE A DOUGTH CAN YOU REPEAT THIS NT SCAN BEFORE DOING THE CVS TEST YOU SHOULD REALLY THINK ABOUT IT FIRST AND IM REALLY SORRY THAT YOU AND JEFF ARE GOING THRU THIS BUT HAVE FAITH MY HEART IS TELLING ME THAT THE TWINS ARE DOING JUST FINE TRY NOT TO STRESS OUT I KNOW IS NOT EASY BUT YOU HAVE PROOF TO BE STRONG EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE JUST PRAY AND WE ALL DOING THE SAME PRAYING FOR THOSE RESULTS TO COME BACK GOOD SO YOU CAN ENJOY THE REST OF YOUR PREGNACY.

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  9. I also want to suggest a 2nd scan. Ask to go to the hospital where they have better trained techs and better scanners. As I am over 35 we went to the hospital where they have a level 2 ultrasound AND a perinatologist will read your scan! There are so many risks to doing a CVS - I would def ask for a 2nd opinion first! Just my 2 thoughts... goodluck with what ever you decide!!!

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  10. OK I just have to comment again because I am so mad for you! (I have 2 boys - 1 natural 1 via IVF and am preg. with my 2nd IVF baby.) Since now I am over 35 - having to wait 5 yrs to afford to do IVF again we were nervous about a greater risk factor. I just went thru the NT testing a few months ago. It is suppose to be combined with a blood test and ques you answer and then they give you a risk level. How can your Dr be suggesting termination without the rest of the results - it takes 1 to 2 weeks to get back!
    Praying for you and your little ones!!!

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  11. This all sucks Shanny. I know how stupid people can be with an u/s machine. An NP at our 11 week appt. couldn't find my baby. She instead found an empty gestational sac with only a yolk sac growing, not an 11 week old fetus. DH and I freaked out until she decided to keep moving the wand around and found what we were looking for. To this day I don't know what it was. I think it was the other embryo that never grew and no one found it until then. The lady was stupid and sounds like your tech was too. I would demand another NT scan first. I never went through the NT scan because I didn't want to have to worry about one more thing. I figured if anything was that horrible, they'd find it at the 20 week u/s. I'm sorry you are going through this.

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  12. I would forgo any testing! God has a plan and it is in His hands. Doctors are WRONG a LOT!! Don't terminate a pregnancy b/c they "think" there might be something wrong. All will work out as it is supposed to in the end. My sister-in-law was terrified after they found "something" on the ultrasound in their daughter's brain. They prepared her for somme devastating scenarios. Come to find out they made a mistake. She is a happy and very healthy normal 9 year old today!! To me, when you test to find something wrong it causes unnecessary worry. You will end up with two beautiful chidren who were made just for you guys. God knows what children need what parents. I will be praying for you guys!

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  13. Shanny, I am in shock! I will be praying for you that both babies are healthy and normal and that you and Jeff will have peace in the decisions that you need to make. Everything is going to be fine!

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  14. Thanks everyone for your support and prayers, we really appreciate it, all four of us :)

    We will be getting another scan at the hospital and if they agree with this tech we have the option to do the CVS right then and there. This will be Thursday. If they find nothing we are free to leave happily.

    To answer one of the questions as to why its being pushed to do right away, my bloodwork that goes in combo with the NT was just sent out this past Wednesday and by the time they get the results I will be over the 12 weeks which is the last week we can do the CVS. Regardless I don't feel comfortable doing it, I have to see what the genetic counselor says and for now I'm praying for a better NT scan result.

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  15. I am faithful that all will be well with you 4, sometimes when really good things come to our lives, things tend to get difficult. Remain calm and have faith that all is well and will remain well!

    God Bless,
    Julie Casas

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  16. oh Shanny, I'm sorry. That sounds beyond scary, and am praying your babies are safe and healthy and hoping with everything I've got the next results come back perfect! Hang in there. Thinking of you!!!

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  17. Ugh, what a scary situation! I'm glad you are going to have another scan and opinion- fingers crossed and good luck with the 2nd scan! Thinking of you all!!

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  18. I'm so sorry Shanny, I hope the ultrasound tech just made a mistake and your babies are perfectly healthy. You are in my thoughts!!

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  19. Oh my goodness, I am so sorry that you and Jeff have to go through this. I am praying for you and those precious babies. Hopefully the next scan will show that everything is fine -- you are such a strong woman, I know that everything will be fine because you can handle whatever they throw at you. Definitely keeping all 4 of you in my thoughts and prayers!

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  20. shanny im sorry about all this and that you have to go through all of this im not trying to scare you but please think about that cvs testing i heard is not good specially haven twins you can miscarriage 1 or both babies and i agree about getting a second opinion be positive everything will be fine im praying for the 4 of you can't wait to hear the good news next thursday sweety

    you are in my prayers everyday

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  21. I'm so sorry you're going through this. How scary!!! Everything HAS to be fine. I'm praying for you and both babies and praying everything is perfect and you get to smack that lady. ((hugs))

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  22. Oh Shanny, why oh why can't this just be a peaceful and easy pregnancy for you? I wish there were some way I could make it happen. I'm glad you'll be getting the second scan. I'm really hoping that it was just a stupid tech and you, Jeff, and the babies will walk out of there with smiles and some not so kind words for the other tech. ((hugs))

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  23. Shanny, I am so so sorry that the ultrasound lady messed up and incorrectly measured your perfectly healthy & fabulous twins! I was so relieved to read you're getting another scan. I am absolutely praying for those babies, you & Jeff! I can't wait to hear how you went back to smack the lady. In fact, I think Jeff should record it for the rest of us to see!! HUGS!!

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  24. I'm sorry I'm so far away . I'll be praying at all times for the precious babies and for you and Jeff. You know I'm always there. I miss you. You are the strongest woman I know! my heart tells me that everything is going to be great. ((hugs)) Mrs. cullen

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  25. Oh Shanny, sorry you and Jeff have to deal with yet another issue. But you will get through this too, and your babies will be fine. Stay strong. Keep positive. It will be okay.

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  26. Shanny, I'm praying that they are wrong and the u/s tech measured you incorrectly. I'm so sorry you are going through this. I'm glad you're standing up for yourself and decided to have another scan before you do the CVS. I'm praying for you, Jeff, and those sweet babies you're carrying. I have faith that everything will be ok. Page or PM me if you need or want to talk.

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  27. I'm so sorry Shanny. I am praying for you that that u/s tech was completely wrong & everything is perfectly fine. I read that the chance of the NT Scan picking up a problem is over 80%, but has a false positive rate of 5%. I hope you guys are int he 5% & everything is fine with both twins. GL @ the CVS. :) I'll be praying for you & your family.

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