I Wish I May, I Wish I Might....

Star light, star bright
First star I see tonight
I wish I may, I wish I might
Have this wish I wish tonight.

I wish I may, I wish I might
Convince my body while I write
To try and relax tonight
And stop being so uptight

I wish I may, I wish I might
That tomorrow I have a successful IUI
That my 2 follies be the right size
That we don't mess up anything this time.

I wish I may, I wish I might
That we get to conceive our child
That this child does not go into the light
I'm wishing this with all my might.

I wish I may, I wish I might
That my body holds no spite
That it doesn't put up a fight
And that it follows the guiding light.

I wish I may, I wish I might
To really stop this ongoing fight
For me and my body to make nice
And to have this wish I wish tonight.

Goodbye Summer '09

The air is cooler.

The traffic is really terrible again thanks to that thing we call school.

The leaves are falling. You don't wanna see my yard but you are welcome to if you are going to help clean it up.

The beach season is gone. Not that we went to any local beach this summer but its always nice to have the option. Ya know?

So to say goodbye, I want to share some pics of things we did this summer that I didn't share before. This way I'll have most of my Summer '09 adventures recorded publicly on ma' blog. Some things are just private.... you know... like when you have embarrassing drunk moments, things like that.  And on that note:

1- Jeff and I had our first barbecue evah!

Of course we only had the proper victims to try it out. My sister and brother with their respective families were our guinea pigs. They are still alive so that's a good thing. They played volleyball, tennis of some sort, climbed trees and I dunno what else. They all played while I slaved myself to the grill. By the time I was done the evening was over, but I learned my lesson: I rather be a guest at a BBQ than a host.... unless of course Jeff decides to share the grilling job... hint, hint.

                                      

 2- We went to a few parties, including my cousin's engagement party. The one that got engaged when we were in Ocho Rios Jamaica during our cruise.

The doomed happily engaged couple.

The nieces:

                                    

 Us.

With my baby niece looking up at me adoringly...

though Jeff thinks she's looking at him... right!

My parents with their kids

3- My mother's side of the family went to a park for Labor day. We did a whole lot of nothing and then we played some ball. My body was in pain for the rest of that week. I ran a lot while my jeans kept falling down, luckily I didn't flash anyone... I think.

                                    This is the only picture I have that I consider decent. 

                                   

4-We went to eat free food at my brother's house a couple of weeks ago for his birthday. And we had cake! Yum =)

                                 

  

                                 

                                 

And 5- Jeff and I made a decision about this baby thing. If all else fails, we are stealing my baby niece. Its a nice way to end the summer right? Planning to steal babies. Great.

Awardee of the Award Awarded to Me!!!

I want to thank God, my family, and all of my fans.... alright so I got  a little carried away, I pretty much just want to thank my lovely blogger friend Cupcakes with Nic for nominating me for the Kreativ Blogger Award:

This Award was rightfully given to her because she is fabulous, funny, witty, of course creative, and if that doesn't get your attention... well, let me tell you a little secret: She has cupcakes, lots of cupcakes, I love cupcakes and therefore I love her Kreative Cupake Blog!


And now for the rules:

1-Thank the person who nominated you for this award.
2-Copy the logo and place it on your blog.
3-Link to the person who nominated you for this award.
4-Name 7 things about yourself that people may not know.
5-Nominate 7 Kreativ Bloggers.
6-Post links to the 7 blogs you nominate.
7-Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know they've been nominated.


7 things about me that people may not know:

1- Sit down cause this may come as a shock to you: I want a baby. Alright, so you knew that... sue me. Actually don't. Here is #1 for real: I'm afraid that I'm meant to be: always an aunt never a mother.
2- My car is a Suzuki Grand Vitara. I chose it because it has an "S" as a logo... for Shanny. Meant to be right?
3- I'm 5'2"ish but my liscense says 5'3" so that's what I say to anyone who asks. I wear heels so whatever.
4- I'm a vampire. Ok, I'm obsessed with all these vampire shows/movies/books so if you stretch reality a bit, then I'm also a vampire. If not, it really should work that way.
5- My favorite show of all time is Friends.
6- I hate doing laundry. But not as much as I hate putting it away.
7- My nail polish has to be the exact same color on my fingers and my toes, always, no exceptions.


And the nominees for the well deserved Kreativ Blogger Awards are:

1- 999 Reasons to Laugh at Infertility
2- Xbox4NappyRash
3- Love and Marriage
4- A Glimpse Into My Thoughts
5- In Her Shoes
6- Rambling Renovators
7- Ask Wifey

Third time is a charm.... They say...

I don't know who "they" are but I think its smart for them to keep anonymous when making statements like this one. Personally, I know I would like to get my hands on them if this third Clomid cycle doesn't work. I won't incriminate myself further by giving you details of what I would do to them. Just keep in mind that "they" probablly pi$$ed a lot of other people off already, I'm just saying....

Will this third time really be the charm? Will it be my lucky cycle? Ooooh the suspense is killing me, not.  Obviously I don't know yet but I plan on "helping" myself out as much as possible. I'm going to buy a bunch of lucky charm cereals and devour them like there is no tomorrow. I'll even share some with Jeff, he is somewhat involved in this so I suppose he can use some extra luck too. I'll probably even send a box to my Dr., he is after all the other guy trying to get me pregnant.... Anonymously of course, I don't want to be dismissed as a crazy patient. Whether it be true or not.  

So considering that: It's 3 of us and a turkey baster, its the 3rd Clomid try, 2 back to back IUI's which will also gives me a total of 3 IUI's, all the lucky charm cereal, the fact that Jeff is part Irish AND my name is Irish-ish, what are my chances of finding my pot o' gold at the end of this rainbow?

Internal Dialogue

Based on this month's trial and the blood result.....

Me: Yo body!
Body: Sup?
Me: I have some great news for you!
Body: Shoot!
Me: This month you don't have to work too hard. I'll take drugs to hook you up and then I'll serve the boys to you in a silver platter.
Body: Hmmmm, no thanks.
Me: Why not? You don't have to do anything. Just sit and wait.
Body: What's in it for me?
Me: Umm, a baby.
Body: That's for you not me. I'm going to suffer for 9 months and it's a lot of hard work. I don't want to.
Me: Pretty please with sugar on top?
Body: No.
Me: Well for your info, I already did it. I bastered you like a turkey.
Body: I'm not a turkey!
Me: Yes, you are! Yes, you are! Yes, you are!
Body: You are tripping.
Me: Yeah, so?
Body: You lost your mind. I'm not doing anything for you.
Me: (screaming) You are giving me a baby this month! I'm putting my foot down!
Body: I have news for you.
Me: What?
Body: I already rejected it. In your face! I win. You suck. Loser!
Me: I hate you.
Body: I hate you more.
Me: Clearly.

Blogging Randoms

Today I have nothing specific on my mind, so my post is going to be all over the place JUST like my hormones. Here is what I have to say:

*I have a headache from hell.
*I'm a bit excited about the Vampire Diaries tonight. I'm DVR'ing it. Yes,I used "DVR" as a verb, it felt right.
*I have to figure out what the next step is if this cycle is a another failure. And fast because...
*I got a BIG FAT NEGATIVE when I tested this morning.
*Today is my 2nd Due Date. I would have had my 2nd baby around now but nooooooo!
*And to top it all off? I can't post pics from my beloved Blackberry! Someone somewhere should fix that.
*I'm actually in a good mood regardless of the negativity mentioned above cause I'm having cake tonight! How come? Well....
*Today is my brother's Birthday! Happy old age dude! Well maybe I shouldn't say that considering I'm 3 years behind him...
*Latazzzzz

11 dpiui

Its been 11 days since the IUI and believe it or not I've managed not to drive myself crazy.
I did drive Jeff crazy though. I had to balance it out somehow, no?

Saturday I go for my blood test. Am I pregnant or not? I don't feel a thing..... Except for cramps, back ache, fatigue, sore boobs, hunger, etc. Good stuff right? Wrong. They are the exact same symptoms I feel when my period is around the corner, plus they could be from my progesterone, or the HCG shot. Who knows?

Either way I'm not excited and I'm not sad. My feelings are nothing but neutral. I'm just ready for the next cycle because that's what I'm used to.

Lookie, Lookie here...

This is what I just got:

My very own Blackberry Tour. Woohoo!!!!!!
I'd like to thank all of you who supported me and kindly "pushed" Jeff into agreeing to get me one. He got one too, that sucker! I'm now officially a "crackberry" owner... and I plan to live up to its name =)
Someone, somewhere should give me some kind of a raise. I'm all corporate in the Internet world now, and surely that deserves an increased paycheck, no?

Thanks Jeff. I knew with some manipulation you would give in and make my dreams come true, I knew you loved me! I knew it! It feels so much better when you prove that love though, heehee.... now I have to go figure out what else I need from you....hmmm....

Am I crazy?

First, a tiny update:
I'm 6 days post iui and I have absolutely no symptoms. I had the occasional cramps the first few days and that was it. I haven't even had any imaginanary symptoms, so I guess I should thank my brain for that.


Now to business:
I wish I could tell you that Jeff and I are spending this Friday night relaxing and brewing a nice little baby, but I can't. I'm home alone probably just brewing gas and Jeff? Well let me tell you where that guy is. He is out at some bar with five girls. Yes, five girls. High school friends he found after God knows how many years on Facebook. And he is the only guy.


You would think I'd be upset,  but surprisingly I'm not. He can hardly handle me so 5 girls will definitley keep him on his toes. I was upset a few weeks ago when he decided that he wanted to work out more often, obviously in my mind it was for them, but instead he gained a pound or 2 so I'm good. He did eventually ask if I wanted to come along, but I decided against it. I figured its better for them to catch up on their own.


The thing is, almost every woman friend I mentioned this to said that I was crazy. They don't understand how it doesn't drive me jealous and they are even more confused as to why I didn't go. Well here is why: I feel confidend in his 2 extra  pounds our relationship and I know he doesn't want to die young. That's all.

The Flop Debate

I have 2 long weeks to kill before finding out if this IUI worked or not so forgive me, but I need to amuse myself. So what's your take on this?

I'm a true believer that flop B is the right answer. And I'm a bigger believer that something is wrong with you if you don't agree. Nothing personal. Really.

Surprisingly, I found that many, far too many, people feel that it should be flop A. Why? I don't get it. Don't they see that gravity (GRAVITY!) has it falling nicely over the roll to the side which is most accessible? How did I decide to blog about this? Well, someone at work keeps putting the toilet paper roll on the WRONG way. They changed the holder to some fancy mechanical kind that I can't for the life of me figure out so I haven't been able to "fix" the problem. I might have to take it up to management, I'll see how this goes. Before they changed the holder, believe me I always fixed the problem.... only to come back and find that the certain someone, clearly a backwards person, put it back the wrong way. I have no idea who this person is but I strongly feel they need some kind of psychological help. I'll pray for them.

So am I alone, am I a wrong flopper? Even if you say yes, I will debate you. I like my flop and I'm sticking to it!